The Whitest Day of my Life

So, I spend lots of time trying to be a "cool" white person. I try to make strides, go places, and do things that help my people become a little less corny. I get very tired of the whole, "white people walk like this…" thing that is prevelent in comedy.

It was with this purpose I went to a Jamaican baby shower. And, it was with this one event that I was directly transported back to reality. I saw for myself just how white I am.

Let me set the scene: The invitation said 9pm. I had to go from Brooklyn to the Bronx. This required a train and a bus and a walk. Two-fare zone you know? So, there was a lot of time spent getting there. I got there at 10pm. I thought I was late.

Wrong!!!!

The party was half empty. The person having the baby wasn't there yet. I saw someone I knew and talked them. However, that was difficult as there was a DJ there playing reggae. The party began to fill up more and more and by 11:30pm food was served.

At midnight the party was in effect. The gifts began to be opened. This was when the DJ got into full effect. When a gift was opened that was especially nice, the DJ would get on the mic and shout, "Lighters!!!" (say with accent) and then on his DJ equipment play the sound of gunshots.

It was during this time that I realized that everyone has cultural differences. It doesn't make it wrong. But it sure did make me feel white.