Available for parties, bar mitzvahs, and no limit Texas hold 'em tournaments.
Birthday Sluts
4 years ago
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Saturday, September 24, 2005
The Last Few Movies I've Seen...
I can actually recommend. The end of summer was brutal with very little to see. However, I can recommend the last few films I've seen. And, I think things are going to get a lot better.
Recommended:
Grizzly Man- A very odd, closeted (possibly) hippie tries to get close to nature. Nature responds by eating him. Amazing footage of real nature, not sugar coated Discovery Channel crap. Werner Herzog directs the film very minimally, but his very German narration (where Timothy saw beauty and order in nature, I saw only death and chaos) is some of the funniest stuff in the movie. Also, two bears fight so hard that one of them takes a huge dump in the middle of the fight.
Broken Flowers- A slight story with some really great acting. Geoffrey Wright and Bill Murray need to make several films together, preferably as these characters. Their scenes are so well-acted and real that the rest of the movie is fine, not great. As all the women in his life Sharon Stone and Frances Conroy stand out. It's nice to see real women the lead actors own age engage in scenes together.
The 40 Year Old Virgin- So funny and a really well-written story. Wedding Crashers made me laugh, a lot. But, the 40 year old Virgin has heart and a nice story that bookends the jokes. The acting is great and Paul Rudd and Romany Malco shine as two of the friends. The physical humor is good, but the writing is also good. The scene involving Michael McDonald's concert footage is hilarious and sets the tone for this very funny movie.
Lord of War- Brooklyn Locales? Check! Interpol Agents? Check! Coke binges? Check! African Dictators? Check! Everything I want in a movie was here. There are funny scenes, but for the most part, this is a serious film about what goes on all over the world while we pretend it doesn't. Brutal in places and very sad in others. Many people in America should see this movie. It won't change the world, but it could change a person's mind.
Recommended:
Grizzly Man- A very odd, closeted (possibly) hippie tries to get close to nature. Nature responds by eating him. Amazing footage of real nature, not sugar coated Discovery Channel crap. Werner Herzog directs the film very minimally, but his very German narration (where Timothy saw beauty and order in nature, I saw only death and chaos) is some of the funniest stuff in the movie. Also, two bears fight so hard that one of them takes a huge dump in the middle of the fight.
Broken Flowers- A slight story with some really great acting. Geoffrey Wright and Bill Murray need to make several films together, preferably as these characters. Their scenes are so well-acted and real that the rest of the movie is fine, not great. As all the women in his life Sharon Stone and Frances Conroy stand out. It's nice to see real women the lead actors own age engage in scenes together.
The 40 Year Old Virgin- So funny and a really well-written story. Wedding Crashers made me laugh, a lot. But, the 40 year old Virgin has heart and a nice story that bookends the jokes. The acting is great and Paul Rudd and Romany Malco shine as two of the friends. The physical humor is good, but the writing is also good. The scene involving Michael McDonald's concert footage is hilarious and sets the tone for this very funny movie.
Lord of War- Brooklyn Locales? Check! Interpol Agents? Check! Coke binges? Check! African Dictators? Check! Everything I want in a movie was here. There are funny scenes, but for the most part, this is a serious film about what goes on all over the world while we pretend it doesn't. Brutal in places and very sad in others. Many people in America should see this movie. It won't change the world, but it could change a person's mind.
Friday, September 23, 2005
An Open Letter to Missy Elliot
Dear Missy,
Holla! It's me Amy. I just wanted to write and let you know how I feel about your new album "The Cookbook". Girl, you know I love you. I have all your albums on my iPod. But, this new album is 50% good and 50% horrible. Now, everyone knows I love when hip-hop stretches. But, don't take this the wrong way...STOP SINGING!!!!!
When you make a club banger you are the tops. Your experimental sound, use of rhythm, and cutting edge guest stars make your songs ready for a spin. But, on your new album there is maybe five songs ready for the club (Partytime, Lose Control, We Run This, Mommy, and Bad Man) and these five songs tear the roof off. "Bad Man" is a dancehall classic and featuring new grime mistress M.I.A. was a typically savvy move.
But, songs about cheating and your man and sex, that is not what your fans want Missy. I'm sorry. Most of your fans like the bangers. I like bangers! Please stop trying to be the Queen of the Quiet Storm. Be the queen of dance, your rightful throne.
Sincerely,
Amy
Holla! It's me Amy. I just wanted to write and let you know how I feel about your new album "The Cookbook". Girl, you know I love you. I have all your albums on my iPod. But, this new album is 50% good and 50% horrible. Now, everyone knows I love when hip-hop stretches. But, don't take this the wrong way...STOP SINGING!!!!!
When you make a club banger you are the tops. Your experimental sound, use of rhythm, and cutting edge guest stars make your songs ready for a spin. But, on your new album there is maybe five songs ready for the club (Partytime, Lose Control, We Run This, Mommy, and Bad Man) and these five songs tear the roof off. "Bad Man" is a dancehall classic and featuring new grime mistress M.I.A. was a typically savvy move.
But, songs about cheating and your man and sex, that is not what your fans want Missy. I'm sorry. Most of your fans like the bangers. I like bangers! Please stop trying to be the Queen of the Quiet Storm. Be the queen of dance, your rightful throne.
Sincerely,
Amy
Thursday, September 15, 2005
All She Ever Wanted
So, I have some actual articles I want to write. But, I'm starting with this frothy brew. I watched possibly one of the most bizarre Lifetime movies I have ever seen. The film was titled "All She Ever Wanted" and features James Marshall (post Twin Peaks, Few Good Men, Gladiator) and Marcia Cross (at her Kimberly Shaw apex).
So, the movie is about a couple who want a child. The wife (La Cross) is severely bi-polar and takes lithium. She decides to go off of lithium to have a child. I will just briefly say that shenanigans ensue. She's manic and sexy and painting. She's depressed and mopey and wearing a big sweater. It's an amazing job. And, like most husbands in Lifetime films this one is completely ill equipped to do anything other than stammer and try to talk her down. The film is extremely convoluted for a one hour and 45 minute movie. La Cross is hospitalized, forced on a feeding tube, almost forced to have an abortion, flashes back to her younger brother's drowning, and in the end loses her baby and goes back on lithium. Wow.
So, I started watching for La Cross and stayed for the bi-polar. I was not disappointed. Marcia Cross gave her typical demented and OTT performance that somehow works. But, the movie was just so bizarre and random that it in no way helps someone understand mental illness. It does however shed light on big sweaters as appropriate attire in a loony bin.
So, the movie is about a couple who want a child. The wife (La Cross) is severely bi-polar and takes lithium. She decides to go off of lithium to have a child. I will just briefly say that shenanigans ensue. She's manic and sexy and painting. She's depressed and mopey and wearing a big sweater. It's an amazing job. And, like most husbands in Lifetime films this one is completely ill equipped to do anything other than stammer and try to talk her down. The film is extremely convoluted for a one hour and 45 minute movie. La Cross is hospitalized, forced on a feeding tube, almost forced to have an abortion, flashes back to her younger brother's drowning, and in the end loses her baby and goes back on lithium. Wow.
So, I started watching for La Cross and stayed for the bi-polar. I was not disappointed. Marcia Cross gave her typical demented and OTT performance that somehow works. But, the movie was just so bizarre and random that it in no way helps someone understand mental illness. It does however shed light on big sweaters as appropriate attire in a loony bin.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Upcoming Amy Events (mark your calendars)
Friday September 30th at 7pm Comedy Cellar (Bleeker Street in the Village, off of W. 4th)
To RSVP call Erik at 646-296-9576
5 bucks and two drinks!
Saturday October 1st at 5:30pm UCB Theater (26th Street and 8th Ave., near Gristedes)
No RSVP
5 bucks and drinks are up to you!
Wednesday October 5th at 7pm Laugh Lounge (151 Essex Street, LES)
Call Club for Reservations 212-614-2500
Price TBD!
Hilarity and shenanigans are sure to ensue.
To RSVP call Erik at 646-296-9576
5 bucks and two drinks!
Saturday October 1st at 5:30pm UCB Theater (26th Street and 8th Ave., near Gristedes)
No RSVP
5 bucks and drinks are up to you!
Wednesday October 5th at 7pm Laugh Lounge (151 Essex Street, LES)
Call Club for Reservations 212-614-2500
Price TBD!
Hilarity and shenanigans are sure to ensue.
Katrina Fatigue
Between the fundraiser and toys program I have not had a lot of time to write. I will have some stuff soon. Tragedy, real ones, make it hard for me to write. But, I'll be back in the saddle next week.
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